Titus Connection Volume 19 Number 4, April 2025

Greetings.  I wish you a Blessed and Happy Easter, celebrating what Jesus did for us on Good Friday and then Sunday came and gave us the power over eternal death, to have eternal life with Him forever!  What gifts we have been given.  Mike

Have you had an experience where there was miscommunication because what was said either meant something different to those involved in the conversation or a term you (or the other person) used had different meanings or connotations which led to confusion or coming up with different understandings or results?   Think about terms that your generation or culture uses that are foreign to other generations or cultures.
Teams are all about relationships between individuals.  Relationships thrive on communication and ministry is relationships.  Consider the insights from Proverbs 16:21-24, “The wise are known for their understanding, and pleasant words are persuasive. Discretion is a life-giving fountain to those who possess it, but discipline is wasted on fools. From a wise mind comes wise speech; the words of the wise are persuasive. Kind words are like honey— sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”
Poor communication contributes to poor relationships and good communication enhances relationships.  This is true in any relationship setting.  If you desire to have better relationships, develop your communication skills.  Developing your communication skills is a lifelong process as we can all keep getting better in some area of communication.
Rarely does anyone over communicate.  We are not talking about someone that talks for the sake of talking.  Rather, the concept here is when you think your message has gotten through to others, chances are some people did not capture what you were conveying.
Communication is a two way process – speaking in a way the listener understands what is being conveyed through your choice of words, meaning, tone and non-verbal aspects.  Then the listener needs to actually be listening and seeking to understand.
Communication equals connectivity.  Teams are all about relationships because leadership is influence in relationships.  If you want to be able to lead others properly, effectively, and humbly, building relationships is central.
Communication encourages commitment as connections between people deepen.  Make sure you are speaking the same language as one another.  When we talk or communicate words, there is more impact on those words than the words themselves.  Just because we are speaking English to each other, does not mean the meanings of our statements are being properly communicated.  Do not make that assumption.  Otherwise, you are going to have a rude awakening.
“ A gentle answer deflects anger, but harsh words make tempers flare. The tongue of the wise makes knowledge appealing, but the mouth of a fool belches out foolishness.”  Proverbs 15:1-2.
Culture, experiences, prejudice, biases, terms, intent, and tone of voice are just some of the variables involved.  Miscommunication occurs so easily when many of these factors are not considered.  This is why dialogue with another person is not a one sentence statement.
Dialogue means interaction, connecting with the other person and having open, honest discussion.  When you do not understand something, indicate you do not understand.  When you use terms, experiences and tone that are common to your world, do not assume the listener is getting what you are attempting to communicate.
As Christian leaders we need to continually work to develop our communication skills.  Next time there is miscommunication between two of you, stop and ponder if you were the reason why what was trying to be conveyed was not properly conveyed.  This takes a degree of humility on your part.
I need to continue to work on my communication skills so most importantly, I represent Jesus well with all my relationships and communicate the way Jesus would do so.  Join me to make that your standard in your communication interactions.

What is at the core of who you are or what standards do you have?  For example, if someone says he or she is a Christian and it is important to become more like Jesus, but does not spend time reading their Bible, praying or hanging around other Christians, is growing to become more like Jesus a standard or simply a hope or hollow promise?
People may say that one of their core values or standards is being a person of integrity.  That is great as integrity is being the same person when you are by yourself as when you are around others.  Or what you would say about someone is the same no matter if the person is standing in front of you or not.  Saying the standard is integrity but when you are not around certain people, you speak negatively or gossip about them but in their face, you would never say those negative things, then integrity is not a core value or standard in your life.
People will name character traits like integrity, gracious, sense of humor, friendly, loving, hard worker, pursuer of excellence (being the best person you can become in all areas of your life), servant or someone who honors God as core values and standards.  The proof of whether what was just mentioned is truly a core value is our behavior.  When a trait or attitude is a core value/standard of a person, our behavior will be consistent with the trait or attitude.
Core values are at your foundation of who you are.  These principles guide your interactions, behaviors, actions and decision making
Having a lot of core values is not necessarily the goal.  Pursuing a smaller number of core values you want to focus your life upon is the goal.  From these values, your behaviors and habits take shape.  Your character develops and you will be known for being a solid, morally sound young person.
When difficult things come about in your life, you anchor your life in these values.  As Christians, our values need to be developed from the Bible as becoming more like Jesus rests on His nature and character.  It is logical as Jesus followers that our standard is Jesus Himself.  Allow His ways and who He is permeate all areas of your life. Imitate Him and ask the Holy Spirit to transform your mind to His mind (Romans 12:2).
What are the standards for your life?  Youth have great opportunities to become developed in the ways of who Jesus is.  You are at the age of formulating your identity and what you are basing your life upon.
If you are unsure of what you really stand for or what you should stand and live for, talk to someone who lives a strong, biblically sound life.  Ask this person how he or she developed and what core values guide their life.  In fact, ask a few people you respect and trust.
As Christians we represent Jesus in whatever we live our lives.  We are ambassadors of His (2 Corinthians 5:17-20), our lives have been changed by having the relationship with Jesus.  Spend serious, quality time thinking through how you want to live your life and what foundational truths and principles you pursue.
Your behavior just do not come out of a vacuum.  They show the real you and what you are made of.  What do you stand for?